With all of my travels and love for culture and people, I wanted to take a minute to share my thoughts about this week and my hope for the future.
"Look it up."
I was taught from a very young age that if I didn't know what a word meant, if I didn't understand something or someone, or if I suspected that there was more to a story, that I should research until I found my answer.
My parents proudly displayed encyclopedias and dictionaries on the bookshelf in the living room and if my brother or I had a question about something we saw on television or in our homework, they could just point to the bookshelf and we knew what that meant.
We were encouraged to be inquisitive and well-knowledged, regardless of our age or education.
Our father taught us to read the newspaper and to love news, history and non-fiction. He challenged us to prove our point and that it was ok to debate - with kindness.
Our mother taught us to speak and connect with any person we met in life. She brought us to church on Sundays, introduced us to everyone she knew and could tell you their kids names, where they lived and where they worked.
I didn't realize until these past two major elections had passed (Canadian & U.S.), that my husband and I had obviously taught my son these very same virtues and habits and I was proud to tweet and re-tweet alongside him until the wee hours the other night.
We may not have agreed on every little detail of either election, but we still respect each other's way of thought.
Within all of the noise in the media, social media, coffee shops and neighbourhood bars, I have been listening, watching and researching.
There is one common cry from all sides - at every election - everywhere.
It is a call for change.
For the people who voted for Hillary Clinton, it was a call for a change to the simmering or blatant racism that many felt daily, for helping women who were more than qualified but not always treated that way, to quieting someone else who is trying to dictate how we should live and love.
For the people who voted for Donald Trump, it simply seemed to be a call for a change to all of the changes. It was sometimes how they expressed that call for change that infuriated others.
The world they knew (as well as ours) has changed so dramatically in such a short period of time that it has been overwhelming for so many.
- Technology has surpassed any sci-fi movie and reduced the traditional industrial floor to a few people operating high-tech machines. The more the technology, the less hands are needed.
- Our banking system has been reduced to online transfers and ATMs. There are many people who have never stepped into a classic bank with tellers.
- We preview, purchase and watch movies online and the newspaper movie listings are now the size of a business card.
- We now message people through social media as often (or even more so) than the once-modern system of email.
- It is rare to meet someone who has full employee benefits or a full pension waiting for them at retirement. It is almost as rare to meet someone who is taking early retirement.
- We cancel our telephone landlines and expect that everyone has a cellphone.
- We are surprised to hear that someone may not have a computer at home.
- We are surprised to find a thick telephone book on our doorstep because the last few have never been opened once.
- As immigration has increased over the last several decades and globalization is no longer a catch phrase, the day-to-day view in even the quieter, rural areas of the world have become diverse and more crowded.
And then a scowling man in a red tie and a loud voice shows up and he is saying all the things that they've been thinking but not saying out loud. They are gathering in halls and stadiums with other like-minded people who are just as frustrated and sharing stories and theories.
For some people, it's not that they were even thinking about wanting a change initially, but that they are looking for a reason or rationalization as to why their old job is gone or their life is not what they expected it to be. They have now met others who called it "wanting a change".
They were looking for somebody to tell them that they're going to fix it.
There are some people who thought they had control over their surroundings and their life and wanted to regain that control so badly that they grit their teeth, clench their fists and fight for every inch.
But at what expense?
Grasping control isn't the sign of strength that it seems. It may just be for a perception of safety.
Trusting another human being and just taking a moment to pause, listen and research is just as strong of an act - and can lead to understanding, even if it doesn't lead to agreement.
I was originally mapping out this blog post with lists of the standard "Be kind to others" suggestions and I now think that this time I wanted a little more detail.
A Suggested Plan For This Changing World
- Have open and honest discussions with people that you normally don't agree with. Agree to disagree.
- Some people have difficulty with change and may need help transitioning. Be patient and be a teacher.
- Teach children to accept and be kind to everyone and encourage them to make their own decisions.
- Read, watch and learn about this world. Not just the town around you but your country, another country, our history.
- Teach people something that you know that may benefit their lives in some way. We all have gifts or skills that can help someone find a new job, start a small business or inspire them to take on a new hobby that gives them joy.
- Learn about your neighbour, co-worker and the person behind the store counter - wherever they may come from. Everyone has a story.
- Travel to someplace new. Someplace that is different will help you even see your own neighbourhood, town or city in a new light when you arrive home.
With all of my travels and with all of the people I have met, I know that people are naturally good and want the best for this world.
The group of Americans who chose the president that I wouldn't have voted for may be different from me and think different things and I don't agree with them.
But I took some time to learn, listen and looked it up.
What I learned it that they are scared about their future. They wish they could turn back the clock to that time in their lives when they knew what their day would be like and there were no new surprises or changes.
They voted and their champion won.
So, now the rest of their country is scared about their future. They had accepted the changes along the way and understood that other changes would be coming.
They are now scared that others want things to go back to a time when they didn't know what their day would look like and it could be filled with not-so-happy surprises and changes.
So, now the rest of the world is scared about its future. This is the second time this year that a country has been divided into those who want to change things and those that want to "pump the brakes". Each country in the world is now looking at itself carefully and hesitantly and worried that their next election, of whatever size, will divide the masses as they all scream for change.
I admit that I am scared, too.
However, I am pretty good at accepting changes, even when I thought they came too fast or strong.
I taught myself what I need to know to get by and adjusted accordingly.
I am now spending more time than ever listening and learning about the cultures and political systems in my own city, province, country and world. I am talking to friends about topics now that matter to the world and the lives around us.
I am listening to my son and his peers - our next generation - about what is important to them. Their generation have accepted the changes in our world faster than any of the rest of us every could and are excited to usher in a different world that we may be used to.
These changes - or their reversal - will affect them the most and they are scared.
